We're really glad that you decided to reach out to us
tonight! Moving to a new state is difficult enough, but when you are
fighting with your parents and being bullied it can feel that much more
difficult. We are so sorry to hear about your friend ending his own
life, we can't imagine how difficult that must be for you right now.
With everything else that is going on, this must just feel like the
straw that broke that camel's back.
You are overwhelmed right now, and that is totally
normal considering what you are going through. Anybody would feel like
they have the weight of the world on them after going through all of
that. You really need to give yourself credit, because after going
through all of that you are still here and still had the strength and
courage to send us an email. You might feel damaged right now, but
having that strength really shows us that you aren't broken...even if it
feels like it.
Your friend ending his life was his choice and his
alone. You spoke with him and probably offered him friendship and
support for how he was feeling. Not everybody who feels upset takes
their own life. You did what you could do to help him get through what
he was feeling. Taking his own life was tragic and we know that you are
hurting so much right now.
People would hurt just as much if you were to take
your life, please don't. You can get through this, you really can. Your
friend decided to use a permanent solution for what were quite possibly
temporary problems; and the solution was definitely not a good one. If
you choose to end your life you are cutting yourself off from all of the
love, enthusiasm, laughter, friendship, and accomplishment that life
gives to us. All of these things can be yours. Do you feel like you are
gonna be able to keep yourself safe?
Can you make a promise to yourself that you will reach
out to your parents or some other adult you trust if you feel like you
are going to harm yourself? You are important and people care about you.
Things feel bleak and overwhelming, but that will change. We just want
you to be alive and well when the day comes that things start to turn up
for you...because that day WILL come.
Bullying is such a crappy experience to go through.
The kids who are doing this to you are really showing how immature they
are. We know that doesn't make the bullying feel any better or go away,
but it really is the truth. You are showing what a mature, level-headed
girl you are by not taking part in bullying yourself. Whenever somebody
is being bullied, the best thing you can do is avoid reacting yourself.
Talk to a teacher at school or the principal, let him or her know what's
going on. You deserve their help. Let them know when and where the
bullying usually happens, that way they can keep an eye on things.
That's really awesome that you've been able to make a
couple friends since you moved to the new school. Having other people
there who you can call friends and spend some time with is a really
great way to remember how appreciated you are. Moving to a new school is
tough, making friends takes some time. By making a couple of friends
you really are showing yourself that you have what it takes to make
more. You can always grow your social circle. In the mean time, focus on
yourself, your interests, and school....friendships take time to go
grow, but that definitely doesn't mean that it isn't possible to make
new friends.
Keep in touch. Please let us know how things are going
and if you can stay safe. Remember, we are always just a phone call or
an email away when you need somebody to talk to. You never have to go
through this alone, k?
Stay strong,
Abe, Counselor
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