Posted: Sunday, December 13, 2015 7:59 pm
Andrew’s role during the holidays was to bring down the Christmas decorations from the attic.
“Christmas was a
very special time for us,” his mother, Yolanda Peralez, said. “Now we
decorate the tree in blue and silver because blue was his favorite
color.”
Andrew Peralez died by suicide on Dec. 12, 2013.
He was 17 years old. The varsity pitcher for the PSJA North High School
baseball team and honor student suffered from depression and a recent
breakup when he decided to take his own life, his family said.
“You take the weather, the holidays, the recent breakup, the stress of being the starting pitcher and the expectations he had in school and it was a recipe for disaster,” Yolanda said.
In the Rio Grande Valley, 856 people lost their lives to suicide between 1999 and 2013, according to the Texas Department of State Health Services. Andrew was one of 40 people who killed themselves in Hidalgo County in 2013. His age group, 15 to 24 years old, has died by suicide at twice the rate of any other age group in the county, according to the Texas Department of State Health Services.
Experts say seasonal affective disorder caused in part by the weather and the holidays can result in an increase in depression that can also lead to suicidal tendencies. Dr. Ricardo Irizarry, medical director at the Tropical Texas Behavioral Health for the Edinburg service area, said their busiest time of the year is usually fall and winter. The largest number of reports at the center are of teens suffering from a mental health crisis.
The Center for Disease Control and Prevention, however, reports the notion that suicides occur more frequently during the holiday season is a long-perpetuated myth. The agency reports the suicide rate in the United States is the lowest in December and states on its webpage that this myth supports misinformation about suicides that might ultimately hamper prevention efforts.
Valerie Rivera teaches a Mental Health First Aid course aimed at preventing teen suicides. She is also program coordinator for Communities in Schools, where she works closely with at-risk kids. She said there are factors present during the holidays that can contribute to worsening depression and lead to suicide if untreated.
“There are kids we work with whose parents don’t have the means to buy them presents for Christmas because they are struggling to provide them with even the basics, like food, clothes and shoes,” Rivera said.
Every year Communities in Schools hosts several food drives and toy drives at schools throughout the Valley to help these families during the holiday break. The program has also encountered many cultural stigmas surrounding mental health that sometimes don’t allow them to provide the help these students need.
“The stigma is definitely high,” Rivera said. “It has a lot to do with the Hispanic culture and where we live, especially with the older generation. We have parents who say they are just being ‘chiflados,’ or spoiled, and their kids just want the attention.”
Rivera said most of the students they identify as suffering from mental illness are 13 and 14 years old. They are trained to identify behaviors like self harm or cutting, a common trend with teenaged females, Rivera said.
Hispanics in the United States are at a higher risk of suicide, especially teenagers and the elderly, according to a report from Mental Health America of Texas. Suicide ranked as the 11th leading cause of death for Hispanics and the third leading cause of death for those ages 15 to 24, according to data from the report.
Through the Say Yes to Life foundation created by Andrew’s family after he died, the Peralezes have helped build awareness and prevention of teen suicide. They are also fighting the stigma of mental health treatment, which sometimes leads parents to disregard the symptoms of mental illness.
“The main issue is that we, as parents, think our teens are already adults and can make adult decisions when they are not yet capable,” Yolanda Peralez said. “Most of the teens that we talk to say the same thing — there is a lot of pressure at home and a lot of pressure at school.”
Andrew’s father, Francisco, remembers the two
dark and rainy weeks leading up to his son’s death. The 17-year-old, who
could eat two cheeseburgers in one sitting, had stopped eating and
stopped caring about how he looked or dressed for school, the father
said. The night before his death, Andrew had an outburst of rage that
was unlike the soft-spoken son they knew.
“I should have taken him to get evaluated at a behavioral center, but I did not know what I know now,” Yolanda said. “I share with the parents if they see a vibrant teen full of life and hope and all of a sudden he just falls and he is not able to get out of it, this is not normal teenage behavior.”
Despite the pain of retelling the story of how they found their son lifeless in his room, the Peralezes have taken it upon themselves to host talks at local schools and churches in an effort to keep more families from suffering as they do.
“We want to take away the stigma because it prevents many from getting help and the more awareness we can create, the more lives we can save,” Yolanda said. “Our son was sick, like someone with heart disease or cancer. He suffered a mental breakdown, and he didn’t know how to deal with it.”
They have organized walks to show other families they are not alone and to start building a local community of advocates willing to, “step out of the darkness,” Yolanda said. Through their work they have encouraged prevention training at school districts like PSJA where three students, including Andrew, lost their lives to suicide in the past two years.
“One of the things we emphasize is to listen and monitor their kids and not to disregard their feelings or problems as normal teenage behavior,” Yolanda said.
A teen’s social media is also an important tool to help monitor what their children are feeling or thinking, Yolanda said. Andrew’s last post on Twitter and Instagram read, “I hope this decision I am going to make is the right one,” Yolanda said. “He could tell the world, but he couldn’t tell me.”
Saturday marked two years since the death of their son. To the sound of Christmas music playing on her phone, Yolanda decorated Andrew’s grave as Francisco wiped it down with soap and water.
“The holidays are hard,” Francisco Peralez said, looking down at the six-foot tombstone with a picture of Andrew in his baseball uniform. The last words their son left this world to inscribed into the black granite: “Into your hands I commend my spirit!”
“This is our tradition now, and this is the result of the decision he made,” Francisco said. “Our hearts will forever be broken.”
khernandez@themonitor.com
“You take the weather, the holidays, the recent breakup, the stress of being the starting pitcher and the expectations he had in school and it was a recipe for disaster,” Yolanda said.
In the Rio Grande Valley, 856 people lost their lives to suicide between 1999 and 2013, according to the Texas Department of State Health Services. Andrew was one of 40 people who killed themselves in Hidalgo County in 2013. His age group, 15 to 24 years old, has died by suicide at twice the rate of any other age group in the county, according to the Texas Department of State Health Services.
Experts say seasonal affective disorder caused in part by the weather and the holidays can result in an increase in depression that can also lead to suicidal tendencies. Dr. Ricardo Irizarry, medical director at the Tropical Texas Behavioral Health for the Edinburg service area, said their busiest time of the year is usually fall and winter. The largest number of reports at the center are of teens suffering from a mental health crisis.
The Center for Disease Control and Prevention, however, reports the notion that suicides occur more frequently during the holiday season is a long-perpetuated myth. The agency reports the suicide rate in the United States is the lowest in December and states on its webpage that this myth supports misinformation about suicides that might ultimately hamper prevention efforts.
Valerie Rivera teaches a Mental Health First Aid course aimed at preventing teen suicides. She is also program coordinator for Communities in Schools, where she works closely with at-risk kids. She said there are factors present during the holidays that can contribute to worsening depression and lead to suicide if untreated.
“There are kids we work with whose parents don’t have the means to buy them presents for Christmas because they are struggling to provide them with even the basics, like food, clothes and shoes,” Rivera said.
Every year Communities in Schools hosts several food drives and toy drives at schools throughout the Valley to help these families during the holiday break. The program has also encountered many cultural stigmas surrounding mental health that sometimes don’t allow them to provide the help these students need.
“The stigma is definitely high,” Rivera said. “It has a lot to do with the Hispanic culture and where we live, especially with the older generation. We have parents who say they are just being ‘chiflados,’ or spoiled, and their kids just want the attention.”
Rivera said most of the students they identify as suffering from mental illness are 13 and 14 years old. They are trained to identify behaviors like self harm or cutting, a common trend with teenaged females, Rivera said.
Hispanics in the United States are at a higher risk of suicide, especially teenagers and the elderly, according to a report from Mental Health America of Texas. Suicide ranked as the 11th leading cause of death for Hispanics and the third leading cause of death for those ages 15 to 24, according to data from the report.
Through the Say Yes to Life foundation created by Andrew’s family after he died, the Peralezes have helped build awareness and prevention of teen suicide. They are also fighting the stigma of mental health treatment, which sometimes leads parents to disregard the symptoms of mental illness.
“The main issue is that we, as parents, think our teens are already adults and can make adult decisions when they are not yet capable,” Yolanda Peralez said. “Most of the teens that we talk to say the same thing — there is a lot of pressure at home and a lot of pressure at school.”
“I should have taken him to get evaluated at a behavioral center, but I did not know what I know now,” Yolanda said. “I share with the parents if they see a vibrant teen full of life and hope and all of a sudden he just falls and he is not able to get out of it, this is not normal teenage behavior.”
Despite the pain of retelling the story of how they found their son lifeless in his room, the Peralezes have taken it upon themselves to host talks at local schools and churches in an effort to keep more families from suffering as they do.
“We want to take away the stigma because it prevents many from getting help and the more awareness we can create, the more lives we can save,” Yolanda said. “Our son was sick, like someone with heart disease or cancer. He suffered a mental breakdown, and he didn’t know how to deal with it.”
They have organized walks to show other families they are not alone and to start building a local community of advocates willing to, “step out of the darkness,” Yolanda said. Through their work they have encouraged prevention training at school districts like PSJA where three students, including Andrew, lost their lives to suicide in the past two years.
“One of the things we emphasize is to listen and monitor their kids and not to disregard their feelings or problems as normal teenage behavior,” Yolanda said.
A teen’s social media is also an important tool to help monitor what their children are feeling or thinking, Yolanda said. Andrew’s last post on Twitter and Instagram read, “I hope this decision I am going to make is the right one,” Yolanda said. “He could tell the world, but he couldn’t tell me.”
Saturday marked two years since the death of their son. To the sound of Christmas music playing on her phone, Yolanda decorated Andrew’s grave as Francisco wiped it down with soap and water.
“The holidays are hard,” Francisco Peralez said, looking down at the six-foot tombstone with a picture of Andrew in his baseball uniform. The last words their son left this world to inscribed into the black granite: “Into your hands I commend my spirit!”
“This is our tradition now, and this is the result of the decision he made,” Francisco said. “Our hearts will forever be broken.”
khernandez@themonitor.com
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